Angst Essentials
by venthuray
Summary: the sir & the her, the he & the she [& you.]
1. He

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Angst Essentials – the sir & the her, the he & the she [& you.]

The Sir & The Her.

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They're living a life which is but a maze full of dead ends. They think they are looking for an exit. But what they don't realise is that there _is_ no exit. And the only way to break free is for them to find each other. And stay together.

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He…

…was once like the rest. Happy, childlike, innocent. But how is one to remain so, living such a life as the one he lived? How is one to be innocent; living a life surrounded by pure evil? How can one _not_ be influenced?

He was born and brought up to be like them. Cunning, devious, scheming. It was a life which seemed impossible to break free from. A life full of twists and turns and dead-ends.

So he built up his own wall around him. A wall of ice, it seemed. Yet it was, at the same time, a wall no one could quite see through. To everyone else he didn't care. To them he was cruel, arrogant, cold. Everything wrong. Everything bad. Everything _evil_.

He returned smiles with glares. He made it so no one could reach him. He didn't bother to explain himself. So no one could ever see the soft, beautiful side of him. So no one would be able to see his tears. So no one would ever take pity on him.

His 'friends' were simply those who walked around school with him. Those who joined him for dinner. Nothing more. To him, they were all just faces. The same person wearing many different masks.

But with each day that passed, he grew weaker. He was falling apart, like a building, which once seemed so tall, so strong.

Every path looked the same, so much that he began to wonder if he really had a choice, wonder if it were all just a trick. A prank. Perhaps it was made to look like he had a choice. So later on he would regret taking whichever path he had. But what are regrets when you don't really have a choice?

And somehow, his cold front simply made the rest more interested in him, more insistent on knowing him, on breaking that wall. Heads turned wherever he went. Yet he walked past all of them without a second glance. Didn't they understand? He was ice. He wasn't going to melt for anyone. Ever.

But then… there was her. And he hadn't counted on that.

Reeeeeeeeeeeeview!! I'll give you a kiss and a hug and plenty of chocolate chip cookies! (: Really.


	2. She

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Angst Essentials – the sir & the her, the he & the she [& you.]

The He & The She.

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And that at the end of it all, he would change her, just as much as she changed him. And then they'd realise that they were both missing something, missing a part of themselves. And that part was each other.

And then they'd fuse as one.

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She…

… was everything he was not. Everything he dare not be.

She laughed at all her brothers' jokes. Even the most ridiculously silly ones, the lame ones, the weak ones. Smiled at almost everyone she came across. A radiant, happy smile. One that showed everyone that she cared. Even when she didn't. She looked at them as if they were all beautiful. As if they all liked her. No, as if they all loved her.

Everything about her screamed innocence. Her light spattering of freckles. Her coppery-red hair. Her soulful, wandering brown eyes. Yet somewhere, in this innocence, held a mystery. Something sacred. Something untouchable. Something everyone knew, yet something no one could get at. An open secret.

She didn't believe in obligations. She believed in choices, that everything a person had was because of a choice, made sometime, somewhere in his life. But of course, how could she think otherwise? She lived in a perfect, happy world. Where everyone loved her: her family, her friends, her brothers' friends.

No one could reach the bitter side of her. Not even herself, for she had shut that part of her away completely. The part of her that was so tired of that façade she presented to the world. Tired of being the perfect one, the protected one. Protected by all those who claimed they loved her. Protected from getting hurt. Protected from being the things she already was.

Broken. Torn. Fallen. [A/N: somehow torn and fallen put together looks like Tom Felton, ne? But that's completely irrelevant. : P]

She seemed so oblivious to all the ugliness around her. But what they didn't realise was that she saw, and she knew. She had long learnt about the imperfection of the world she lived in. But she didn't want to care. To her, it was like a stain. A stain she tried so hard to wash away with her smiles, her laughter. But when she couldn't, she turned a blind eye to it. She didn't want to see. Didn't want to believe that the one thing she wanted so much to do, she couldn't. Didn't want to know of evil and wickedness and mud.

Her happiness lay in something that didn't exist. An empty hole. A hole no one could make up for. 

But him –

He could.

Could he?

C'mon, c'mon, review! You know you want to. (:

Oh, and choc chip cookies coming right up!

For --

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Fen: thank you, dear. –hands you an extra large cookie for being the first to review-

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The raging quiet: haha thank you! I have more reviews now, eh? (: -hands you a cookie-

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Daisie: thanks! And I almost didn't mention, DAISIE YOU WONDERFUL PERSON you've reviewed every single one of my fics so far! –gives you a big hug and hands you an extra large cookie too-

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Ang3l666: haha, here's the second chapter now, yeah? Hope you enjoyed it! : D! –hands you a cookie-

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Mad_Maudlin_42: we-ell… maybe I shouldn't tell you but, anyway, it's about Draco. The first chapter at least, uh huh. : P I don't write Snapefics… or at least not yet. –winks- I'll be sending another version of your cookie over there soon. (: Yep, I know the feeling. Many a times I've felt the same, yeah. Mmhmm. And here's the 'more'. Hope you liked it! -hands you a choc chip cookie and smiles brightly-

Once more, thanks to all you lovely people for reviewing!!


	3. They

**Angst Essentials – the sir & the her, the he & the she [& you.]**

[& you.]

= = = = =  
  
They were like two fitting pieces of a puzzle. Each had what the other didn't. And only by bringing them together, would this puzzle finally be complete.  
  
= = = = =  
  


  
Perhaps it was the way her gaze seemed to always meet his. Or the way her eyes would be filled with hatred and disgust every time it did, yet at the same time it held innocent wonder, as if questioning his every movement and the reasons behind them.  
  


  
Perhaps it was the way he would glance at her with such intensity every time they brushed past each other in the hallway. Or the way he would look down at his feet the instant his eyes met hers, as if ashamed of something.  
  


  
And so there was, between them, a strange connection. Something they were bound to. And something which bound them together. It was like an invisible bond stretching between them, tugging at each of them, pulling them towards each other, so no matter what, their eyes always seemed to meet, however involuntary. However much they tried to look away, they always found their gaze drawn towards each other, even if for a split second.  
  
  


Yet every time he tried to truly look at her, he would see a flicker of confusion in her eyes. 'What do you want from me?' they seemed to say, a question always left unanswered.  
  
  


Yet every time she stole a peek at him, his ice cold front seemed to return, as if she had imagined the bond between them, as if it had just been her eyes and her heart and her mind, all playing tricks on her.  
  


  
And so they simply tucked that part of themselves away. The part that made them see something else in each other. Something no one else could see.  
  


  
In him, she saw pain. But his kind of pain she knew she would never be able to understand. Something so deep and profound and alien to her, that she would never be able to comprehend it. And a softness, when he looked into her eyes, the very reason why he avoided letting her eyes meet his.  
  


  
In her, he saw a sadness which made him feel almost sorry for her. Almost... protective. And fear. But her fear was nothing like anything he had seen before. She wasn't afraid of him, or of Voldemort, or of getting killed. She was afraid of herself.  
  


  
And so they tried to live their lives as they used to, with her being ridiculously cheerful and him being even colder than usual. But there was something that clawed at each of them, something they couldn't shake off.  
  


  
In his dreams he saw her, in her eyes a bitterness. And there, on her face, an accusing look, as if he had done her wrong. A look that made him feel guilty, something he had never felt in his life.  
  


  
In her dreams she saw him, with pleading eyes, and a look – a look so sad it pained her, although she saw no reason why it should, a look which made her jerk awake, her face soaked in cold sweat, and in tears.  
  


  
It seemed strange how just a week ago, she was someone he totally didn't care about, someone unimportant and insignificant. And he was simply someone she completely despised, her brother's enemy. And yet now they were haunting each other, even in their dreams.  
  


  
And so he began studying her once again. Her every breath, her every smile. A smile which once seemed so real. A smile which was now becoming hesitant. And he saw the way she was beginning to lose herself, the way she was beginning to seem nervous around people.  
  


  
And so she began stealing glances at him once again. His ice-cold mask was beginning to falter, she would notice with wonder, and a smile would sometimes creep up his face, almost without his knowledge. A smile so forgotten.  
  


  
It didn't make sense to either of them. But what they didn't realize was that it didn't have to. It was this confusion that made their lives seem more real. And it was the beauty of this reality that made them seem more alive.  
  


  
And so they stood there, in the middle of the hallway, facing each other, with uncertainty written all over their faces. With hesitation in their eyes. And then everything was laid out before them.  
  


  
His gray eyes against her brown ones. Her smiles against his smirks. His cruelty against her kindness. Her warmth against his apathy.  
  


  
Fire against ice.  
  


  
And there was the sudden realization that came upon each of them. If not for the coldness of ice, would fire seem as warm? And if not for the warmth of fire, would ice seem as cold? Likewise, between the two of them, there was this strange contrast. Each brought out the reality of the other, and then it all made sense. The connection between them, the looks, the dreams. Everything.  
  


  
And suddenly, in their eyes, appeared laughter. Laughter unlike the childish giggle of hers, whenever one of her brothers told a joke. Laughter unlike the haughty snort of his, whenever Potter was in trouble. It was, instead, a laughter that made everything around them seem non-existent. A laughter that brought tears to their eyes, and joy to the heart.  
  


  
And so they just stood there, staring at each other, their faces stained with tears, yet filled with joy and happiness. Like two people who were silly and senseless.  
  


  
Like two strangers in love.

Whee! Should I end it here? Hm? It was originally intended to end after three chapters. But I don't know. Tell me what you guys want, eh?

And now for the Review Replies! (:

**Crimson3: **haha thank you! I love compliments like yours. ;) –ego inflates and bursts- ouch. anyway, yep, it's Draco and Ginny! You got it. (:

**Daisie: **yay! glad to hear you liked all my fics. –grabs all the big cookies flying towards me-

**Mad_Maudlin_42: **hullo! great to see you back again. Your poetry? You write poetry? That's cool! I love poetry. Maybe you could show me some of yours sometime. (: sorry there's no Snape. :P Don't worry, I love him anyway! Don't we all?

**Solitaire:** Hah, Sol, you sneaky little person! You again. Bigger person? Right. See, you're growing fat. That's why you should come running! I told you to. Don't you know running makes people happy? (: You sound so reluctant to type anything about the fic. Hmpf. Renders the review void, silly. Isn't reviewing the fic the whole point of writing the thing? Anyway. Firefly? I don't really listen to pop anymore. Remember, I developed this _thing_ against it. Good things? What kind of good things? And what chocolate chip cookie! You never gave me any! Stinky. Hnh.

**Ang3l666: **haha thank you! It _would be a nice surprise if Tom Felton turned up in a fic, eh? No such luck, though. :P Well, here's the third chapter! Hope you liked it. (:_

**Izabel****: Hah. Thank you! Mysterious... I like that. (: Yep, it's Draco/Ginny. You'd have won the bet. :P Well, here's more! Hope you enjoyed it too.**

**Fen: **hullo hullo Fen! Thanks. And you're welcome. :P Argh, everybody seems to be secretly yearning for Tommy. Well, what can I say. (So'm I. :P)

**jellypoosyne: **Ahah. Thank you! I wasn't sure the title was appropriate at first. Heh. Don't love it too much! Or nobody will be able to read the bits. :P

**fwala865:** Thanks lots! Hope I'm keeping up to your expectations. (:

**theragingquiet:** Thank yoooo! –hugs- There. I've updated now. (:

There! Finally done. Phew. See y'all next time! (: (: (:


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